10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT SUMMER (aka I love whining).

See what I did there?

Combined two mediocre romcoms 

to make one epically brilliant blog post title. 

My parents often tell me I'm a prodigy. 

Anyhoo - 

all (half) jokes aside, there are several things that I strongly dislike about the change in season. Many of them are - yes, sartorially related, 

but I can't help it. 

Nothing says nerd like layers upon layers of unappealing fabrics - 

so naturally I find it hard to express my true self when limited to one or two measly pieces. 

So, without further ado, 

10 things I hate about summer:

1. Bra visibility

Is it just me, or does every relatively low cut top immediately put the badoozles out front for the world to see?

True, it could be the Vikki's Miraculous number I insist on wearing under every ensemble and it's propensity for bulging out from beneath, but that really doesn't make it any less obnoxious. 

2. Strap loss

The whole "oops, my-strap-fell-off-my-shoulder-let-me-seductively-put-it-back-up" thing is cute for the first, like, 5 seconds - at which point nudity becomes a really appealing alternative. 

3. Horrible wind

I have a personal grudge against the wind. Every time it blows, I picture it's annoying rude little face spewing air into mine, laughing at how horrifically intolerable it consistently insists upon being. 

4. Weak shoe options

Dainty shoes are no fun. 

 But neither are sweaty feet.

Enter: the gladiator boot; satisfyingly chunky, sufficiently airy. 

Needs to get me some. 

5. Night vs. Day discrepancy

At least in winter, you fully expect it to suck 24/7. 

That frigid contrast between night and day during the summer makes it virtually impossible to dress practically. 

Ever. 

What works at 12 noon is the worst decision of your life come midnight. 

Unless, of course, you have a boyfriend who gives you his sweater, 
in which case you're that obnoxious girl whose boyfriend just gave her his sweater. 

6. Shaving

a picture says 1,000 disgusting words.

7. Excuses for hoboness

Long gone are the days when pajama-wear can be blamed upon inclement circumstances. Nobody's going to buy that "it was too hot to not wear a holey sweatshirt and velvet leggings". 

Not like that'll stop me - 

just make my inability to rise and shine chicly much more conspicuous. 

8. Idiocy on display

I'm an idiot. 

More people are outside to see me being an idiot. 

badda bing badda boom

9. At this point in the listing process, my desire for non arctic temperatures and late night campfires is outweighing my hatred for wind and love of hobo haute. So let's pull a plot twist and make this a grande finale to never forget. 

Because, 

Dear summer. . . 

10. "mostly,

 I hate the way I don't hate you — 

Not even close, 

not even a little bit, 

not even at all."

dress: Free People (similar), vest: Urban, boots: Jeffrey Campbell

God, aren't I just precious? 

photos by sheeds.