Choke to fresh.

Remember that one time, 

when you bought a candy choker necklace, 

and then proceeded to slobber all over it's candy-coatedness until your neck, shirt, hands, face, entire being was covered in sugar-filled fluid of the most unsanitary sort?

source

Good times. 

And then remember winning one (read: 15) of these at the school carnival? 

source

Or trying to apply one of these wonders with the longest constructed wet paper towel on the face of the planet?

buy here ;)

Hello wet t-shirt contest. 

Above reasons are only the beginning to a potential 10-page rant about why I've grown to hate choker necklaces.

Memories of terrible childhood disposable camera images filled with bumpy-bottom buck teeth and gratuitous neck chub (you know exactly what I'm talking about) have deterred me from the dreadful accessory's application ...

Until now. 

I don't know what it is that swayed me. 

It could be the recent uptick in the number of chocker sightings via fashion week, celebs, runways, etc, etc... 

source 1, 2, 3

though it's likely just the desperate nostalgia that accompanies my premature quarter life crisis.

Either way, 

I think I'm fully ready to reclaim the choker from the grips of ...

source

that. 

We need to reassess it's origins, though, if we're going to refuel an age-old neck fauna frenzy. 

The choker is not a free school fair gadget to be gnawed, 

NO

it is an indicator of STATUS -  

source

of class,

source

PSYCH

or, at the very least, 

of sex appeal.

the uniform of prostitutes in 1800s (source)

With that out of the way,

I think we can forgive the one (really) bad decade of choker errs in favor of the hundreds of good, and rewrite the choker as a respectable marker of sophistication, rather than the teeny bopper faux pas that it's become. 

Sort of like how learning about Brad Pitt reignited the passion for a name (bradley) that had been sworn off years before in response to an unfortunately immature childhood enemy.

Or how A-line pleated skirts sorta seemed a little bit cool after no longer being associated with that weird rich kid school down the street. 

so choke on, kids, 

choke on. 

choker: Urban (similar & amazing one & another), dress: American Apparel, skirt: Anthropologie (similar & one on whitehouseblackmarket.com)

Cheers.