We spend a lot of time pretending.
We pretend to care about non-issues, to understand what our bosses are saying, to feel confident in awkward situations, to not have anxiety when we're 3 weeks behind in New Girl and feel like our friends have moved on in life without us, etc, etc.
In my case, as someone who's interested in fashion and living in Wisconsin, I've spent a lot of time pretending that I can be equal to anyone born and raised in, well-- not Wisconsin.
(haven't done a great job. For fun, go 'head and Google "Midwestern Nerd".
oh good lord).
Which I probably can. And have.
In fact, I've become quite good at dumbing down certain traits while amplifying others in order to meld more seamlessly into intimidating social situations.
It's an art form. An art form largely based on numbing myself to the extent that I no longer respond naturally to stimuli. Excited to meet someone famous? Kill it. Shocked at how petty an industry has become? Ignore it.
It's a temporary fix, and in truth, likely not an intelligent one.
How long can you negate your own upbringing - your own personality - before you lose the ability to question things? How often can you feign dispassion before you actually internalize it?
And isn't there something incredibly scary and eye-opening about accepting something that you once thought of as embarrassing or shameful as true and real and legitimate, and allowing that acceptance to fuel a new way of thinking? Once you stop ignoring traits and start accepting them, I think maybe you gain a rare ability to examine old ideas from a new angle.
|photo by matt engelhart|
Why can't I embrace that maybe I'm naive and a little (lot) bit sheltered and probably extremely unknowledgeable about most situations and move forward? How would fashion look through the eyes of a child? Or a recluse? Or a nerdy midwestern twenty-something with a strange affinity for leather and hobbits?
It's why I love this shirt by The Burban.
Embrace that embarrassing suburban reality/urban aspiration and use that to change how you see the world.
|shirt by The Burban|
I'm still coming up with what my ideal shirt would read.
Stay tuned. It's sure to be awkward.